The Power in our Weakness

 

This morning I’m feeling weak, tired and overwhelmed. I feel as though my perspective has been clouded by my inability to take hold of my frustrations, and minor moments become major situations far too quickly. Sometimes a specific situation can trigger this uninvited emotion, but other times it wells up from the burdens that I’ve buried deep down that rise unexpectedly when I’ve fallen behind on self-care. This morning, it’s the latter.  

In moments like these, it’s so easy to let shame and condemnation rule my heart. As wives, as mothers, and as women, we sometimes place the burdens on ourselves and then become angry and frustrated when we don’t live up to our own expectations. At my lowest, I am tempted to allow guilt and shame to rule my heart, BUT THE LORD is what I hear ringing inside my head and my pained heart during those times. It reminds me that God is good and that he forgives us so much more easily than we forgive ourselves. 

Forgiveness is the antidote to those moments, and I fill my home with it like a beautiful fragrance that changes the atmosphere. I use apps to listen to scripture, and while soaking in the powerful Word of God, I am able to refocus my attention off of myself and back to him. Today I felt a prompting from the Holy Spirit to continue listening even after my daily reading was over. Impatient to get on with my day, I almost ignored the call, but I sensed I needed more. I found a theme dedicated to stress based on Psalm 138 and began to echo the psalmist’s words, praising the Lord as I did so. I then listened to Isaiah 40:21-31 and took time to breathe in the truth: even though I am weary, there is hope. God stretches out the heavens (v.22), not me! No burdens are too big or too small for him.  As I read through verse 21, God gently whispered to me: “Sandee, do you not know? Have you not heard? Lift your eyes and see, Sandee” (v.26). So instead of dwelling on my own frustrations and tiredness, I began to meditate on the goodness of God. On his love, his mercy, his grace, and the beautiful gift of forgiveness that he offers to us all. I still felt weak and tired, but the overwhelming grip began to loosen. 

Taking this precious time to refuel every day is already helping me parent in a more Christ-like way. I’m far from perfect,  but I’m making a determined effort not to let my weakness rule my heart. Instead, I’m trying to learn from it and be strengthened in the ONE who knows what I need even before I do!  Our weaknesses allow God’s power to shine through and not be wasted.  Now I will go and prayerfully leave my shortcomings at the feet of Jesus and connect with my family, humbly acknowledging my need for forgiveness. Not how I planned my day to begin, but this is where God has me today. 

 

Grace, it’s all grace.

Grace Upo Grace by Matthew West

 

Psalm 138, Isaiah 40:21-31